Thursday

Viv in Shorts

Alright, you know how yesterday I was all "shorts are SO important! Go buy shorts and wear them right friggin now!" Shorts shorts shorts!" Well, here's the thing. I don't even like shorts. For me! I know, I am such a jerk, right?! Did you JUST get home from the mall with like 8 new pair? (I'm so proud.) Well, the problem is my thighs, you see. I choose to keep them in hiding and captivity in garments like dresses, skirts and pedal pushers- so I avoid shorts. Now you know the truth.

See me in (long) shorts here:



Hear me in (short) shorts here:

Viv: Oh look at you guys!
R Thigh: Geez Viv, did you think we left? We've been here all along under all the dresses.
L Thigh: Yeah, if you hate us, why don't you take us to the gym or something!
Viv: UMM! I do!! Like every day! Why don't YOU cooperate and stop looking like that!
R: Well, we all ARE 30 now, it takes more work, you know.
Viv: Well... that's true I guess. Dang it.
L: Yeah, and we all like to have wine! And extra sleep.
R: You know, we like skirts and dresses more than shorts anyway!
Viv: That IS true Lefty, we DO like dresses better.
L: Screw the shorts, Viv.
Viv: Yeah, screw the shorts. Let's get me some wine.

End of story.


5 comments:

  1. Viv, if I had your thighs I'd wear shorts everyday. You look fabulous.

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  2. I can't believe I just read this... I can't believe you are complaining about YOUR thighs... unbelievable... you are insane... I think you are PERFECT

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  3. LOVIN' your blog!!! Can't believe I just now found it! (finally started figuring out stuff on Facebook and saw the link).

    Anyhow, I agree w/ D on this- your thighs are TEENY!!! But I'm also with you about shorts in general... nothing above the knee on these legs!

    Luv ya, babe!

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  4. Uhm I'm pretty sure you have NOTHING to worry about and that your legs look ridiculously long and amazing in shorts.

    If I can go in public with my cottage cheese and stretch marks and not evoke terror, fo dang sho you can!

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  5. I just found you through Kendi's 30/30 links! I'm doing a version of the challenge, too. You can find me over at http://www.aprettypennyblog.com. Looking forward to following your progress, and good luck! :)

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