Wednesday

Holiday

Christmas is over. The only good part of that statement is that we no longer have to witness people wearing Holiday themed sweaters and earrings and socks and headbands and other ridiculous attire. Why do you do this to yourselves? Why do you do this to your children? Why do you decorate yourself like a friggin Christmas tree, with tinsel and bobbles and plastic candy canes dangling from your body... Do you want us to also put gifts under your dress as well? Maybe a star or an angel on top of your head? That would be really pretty. Sheesh.
How about, wear normal clothes. Please.


Acceptable Holiday Attire. by Vivianne H. Park
Sequins
Lace
Sweaters: wrap, cardigans, toggle front, bead embellished
Red and white stripes (age 10 and under ONLY)
Fur (faux is acceptable- and please do not throw paint)
Red, Black, Charcoal, Jewel tones, Winter white

Unacceptable Holiday Attire:
Reindeer horns (unless you are yard art)
Holiday jewelry (especially those that flash or repeatedly play Deck The Halls)
Elf suits (unless you are paid to wear one)
Sweaters or sweatshirts with the following scenes:
-wolves in snow, wearing Santa hats.
-Santa in his sleigh soaring through the starry sky, shouting "Ho Ho Ho"
-Family of cats gathered around the table, enjoying a Christmas turkey dinner. That is disgusting, don't you think?
-Santa's ass, squeezing into a fireplace, with presents and soot scattered all about someone's living room.

Please note.
Thanks, and Happy Holidays.







Thursday

Vivi Loves Shopping: Party Dresses

I have always loved shopping. Ever since I was like... born. My Grammy STILL takes me, yes still, and I am too old for my Grammy to take me shopping. ;)

"Vivi Loves Shopping" will be a reoccurring post of my latest obsession, or whatever I think I need that week... obsession is a pretty strong word. Suggestions are welcome - and if there is something you are shopping for, please let me know! I am happy to help, but if you ask me for my opinion, please know that I will give it honestly!

Party Dresses!
What a great category to begin with. Who doesn't love a party dress for the Holiday season! I wish I could wear a party dress every friggin day of the year though. I am not joking. Not one bit.

While shopping this week, I noticed a few specific trends:
Jewel tones (common for the Holiday season!)
Metallic coloring and embellishment
Asymmetric silhouettes
Full skirts
Back detail

Enough talking. Lets shop.



Antonio Berardi


Halston Heratage


Sass & Bide


McQ.


Thread Social


Juicy Couture

Each of the above can be found on netaporter and revolve and shipped right to your doorstep, just in time for your Holiday par-tay! Cheers!


Tuesday

A Trainer



Today I saw a woman wearing "scrunchie socks" at the gym. Where does one even purchase scrunchie socks anymore?

I mean, these were the good ones. The really lofty, fluffy kind. They looked GOOD with her high tops.

But I can't rip on her too bad. She was paying for a trainer. Maybe she can pay me to train her socks.


Sunday

Spider Woman

I was crossing Park Ave, on my way to work the other day. It was the first REALLY cold day so far this winter, so everyone was super bundled up. Before I had even a moment to grab my phone from my bag, I spotted a woman... wearing this!



No, it was not a robber. No it was not an 8 year old boy. It was a woman. A GROWN WOMAN... How could I tell, you ask? Well her blonde curls were flowing from beneath the robber mask, and I could see skinny little legs with hose and HEELS beneath her full length khaki wool coat. Can you imagine this yet?

Well, it gets better... or worse, I mean...?

The robber mask was not black, like the one shown here.

It was bright blue.

With red trim around the eye holes, and mouth hole.

Yes, I tell you. Like Spider Man. Or... Woman...

This lady is walking her khaki-coat-wearing-self, in her pumps and hose to some desk job in Midtown ... where she will enter her office building, only to promptly discard of her Spiderman mask, along with her khaki coat, just in time to hurry to the elevator with some of her coworkers. Doesn't she ever wonder if any of them see her wearing it on the street? Does her face ever get so warm and comfy on her way to work that she forgets to take Spidey off in time ... ?!!

What. The. Hell.